I am dumb, my friend is the dumbest. It’s difficult to talk to the dumbest woman in the world, said by the dumb. It’s tiring to explain our opinion to someone that has too much heart on everything.

  • Woman : “I am going to your house tonight”(6 PM currently speaking)
  • Man : “Yes, come at 11.59 PM, because I need to do thing first.”
  • Woman : “So you don’t want me to come? It’s ok then, go do your thing!” (she expect to come at 8PM)
  • Man : “WTF did I do? I said I want you to come but give me time first to do my thing”

A couple of times I experience these conversations just to end up fighting on small things. I just don’t understand the logic. Am I dumb or the dumbest? Conversations need two persons, who has good sets of logic, and much better with the same common interests. Sometimes its not.

Communication skills is not something that can be learned in fast learning programmes. It need a lot of practices. You are progressing from simple small talk to a public speaker. A guy, like Peter Drury, he is the best commentator when a team attacking rapidly.

I am not an expert on communication or even have negotiation skills like people from BAU (Behavioral Analysis Unit) of Quantico, but it doesn’t need expert to see way through, you can be a manipulator.

I succeed on manipulation using only words to ask someone to do things that I want. It involves understanding someone’s character, their behavior towards things, their habits, their way of thinking and speak.

It’s very simple and everybody can do it. Let’s just take a simple manipulation, if you want to ask someone to fetch you a coffee from Starbucks, what would you say to him/her without alerting any signals of ordering? You can say few things, but try it yourself and tell me about it.

The fact of manipulation root way back before the Starbucks’ coffee scene. You would like to develop a trust between you and your subject, developing a bound, the tighter the bound, the likely it it to manipulate him/her. Man is up for loyalty, and woman is for love.

Through manipulation, your communication will become one way, from you to them. It’s when the magic happens. And if you give them the way not to fight back, the bound will become king and slaves relations, that’s what Charles Manson did back then.

Communication is hard thing to do. You need to see things from their side of view. What they would see of you if you said things. It’s hard when you see a stranger without you doing any background checks first.

It’s even harder if you don’t know their language and their culture.

Let’s say in a Job Interview. You meet a completely stranger. Mostly you hear only yourself talking too much to convince them to accept you as an employee, because when you talk, they talk to themselves in their heads. They questioning everything negative about you, so you need to impress them about what you know about them, the company.

Have you run backgrounds checks on the company? Did you find something you can bring up to them about what you found? You are a BAU in this life, either you want or not, because communications run everyday in your life and to get what you want you have to think like them.

If you want someone to buy from you, you have to know what they really wants. Focusing on your products and what you want ( big fat bag of money ) will never cut out. It is them you want to focus at. If you apply the dumb and the dumbest conversations in this, you will end up losing.

Woman in the beginning “expect” to meet Man at 8PM, how would Man know about her expectation? Woman doesn’t talk the obvious, they talk in their heads and it is your job to know that as a man. It doesn’t fair? I does not have to be. But let the dumbest said what they want to say, you are the dumb that need to be smart on it. {click to tweet}

I would appreciate your opinion about this matter, so that we can learn from each other better to live this life abundantly!

Featured Image : Photo via VisualHunt